I’ve never met the old man who walks stooped past my house, but I know everything about him anyway.

He was born in 1921 in Pennsylvania.  His father was a functional alcoholic who hid his alcoholism behind the curtain of social norms which dictated heavy drinking after work hours for those who wished to fit in and move up the professional ladder.  His mother was sober and tired.  He is the youngest of ten children, all boys.  He flew in WWII briefly before crashing his airplane into the Sahara when the engines suddenly cut out.  He had sex with many, many women, even after he got married to Sandra, a nurse from San Diego.  Sex is all he can think of when he finds himself face-to-face with a woman, even now. Actually, he’d love to bang the nurse that comes to his house every morning at 6:30am to help him out of bed, into his clothes, and onto his feet for his regular stooped walks. He knows not to ask and just settles for those moments during the neighborhood strolls when her hand brushes against his on the aluminum walker.

He’s not the only one I know.  Even though we have never exchanged anything more than pleasantries, I know everything about the young woman behind the counter taking a million orders and making a million coffees.

She’s 23 years old. Just graduated from Occidental after five years.  Which, that took longer than expected, but what can you do?  Working and going to school turned out to be harder than it seemed. Her suspicion that those who could not handle both school and work were probably feeble turned out to be wrong. Lots turned out to be wrong.  She was formidable in her teenage years. Strong and smart.  Odd looking but beautiful, like a giraffe.  She carried herself like a goddess in the ancient sense. Imagine the Winged Goddess Nike. Like that.  Boys feared her, and so they should!  Smiles were not something she bestowed upon the fawning male. She regarded friendliness as akin to stupidity, and this belief was constantly reinforced by the giggling, super-nice!, girls that would finish every sentence with the upward lilt of a question? and then fail every science test.  But, it turned out, she was not the only formidable girl in college. There were many formidable girls. Many Nikes.  And then there was the bankruptcy.  Her parents were not entirely what they seemed, it turned out. Fraud.  And courtrooms.  And bankruptcy.  And so it was up to her to pay for college.  And while there are many other strangers I’ve never met who I know would have become embittered by their change in circumstance, she did not.  Humiliation was met with humility.  Strong and smart.  Strong enough to shoulder her responsibilities.  Smart enough to learn that people are friendly not because they are dumb but because they have to trudge through the same days that we all have to trudge through.  So she smiles when she sees me, looks at me with her bright, intelligent eyes, and wishes me a nice a day.  I believe her.